Making sense

It was a long long week.

Actually it was two weeks and I have not gone through this for a long time. Everything including the values I held strongly were seriously tested. My body is off synch with my age, my needs are completely thrown off track. I have not experienced this before, never felt so lost and aimless without any real crisis before. These two weeks, I lost myself completely, only to pray that things will make sense again. There were only questions without any answers.

Shown a friend around for a while today, despite the fact I am having a sore throat and flu. I behaved like a tourist in Singapore today. There are new places that I have not seen or explored. It has been a long time before I met someone who is my type but I have zero sexual desire for. He is totally cute. Totally my type of ONS.

I must be older now, not necessarily wiser, I need to be single again so that I could evaluate my purpose in life and my role in this body I own. I need to be able to hold platonic relationship with men and women to understand how sex play a part in my life, yet not allowing it to manipulate me. I have been running like mad for months, it is time to take stock of this year again and regain that lost child in me before he is gone too far.