Chong Lai 從來

I am never good at taking photographs. Hopeless actually. Many of my close friends are excellent photographers and some of them are actually professionals. I cannot even take a decent photo to save my own life. Was running through my IPhoto and found this. This is one of my fave photo, the steps of the Sydney Opera House. Sydney is one of the many cities I visited over the past years. Been there 3 times and know some close friends there.

The photo was later used as part of a poster in one Chinese play directed by a friend. That was August 2004 when I first meet T again after we were first introduced by a mutual friend. By pure coincidence, the rows of black cushioned seats in the Substation was used as part of the play and looked just like the Opera House steps. T was sitting on the third row from the front and I was sitting the highest row with a friend. At the end of the play, we saw each other. Another pure coincidence, we just sms each other that same morning and chatted that we are watching a play. The play is named "Chong Lai" (or To and Fro in English). You can even read it like Restart in English.

In 2006, I finally had my first acting stunt in a play. The director is the producer of "Chong Lai".

This photo meant a lot to me. The poster din really looked great but it brought me closer to T. Life is always full with surprises, disappointment and uncertainties. I am not even sure where will I be in two years time. There is a constant desire to be free and wonder anywhere I want,not wanting to be answerable to anything. Yet, there is a need to want to be tied down by something or someone. Someone that matters to me. If there is a chance to have a "Chong Lai", I know I will stand at the cross road, not knowing exactly what is good for me or T.

One day, you wake up and realised that the things have changed, they seemingly familiar yet when you examine them closely, they are completely different. You forced yourself to piece together whatever memories left, in order to find that secure feeling of familiarity, consciously denying that the loss of emotional links. We all are holding onto things that we got accustomed to, simply because we spent so much efforts to make them happened and that they helps us to make sense of the world. We think they are precious and when they are gone for good, we cried for the loss of the meaningless objects, when we are actually just mourning the emotional linkage to them.

I blah too much in my blog and by now, you will realise that in all my postings, the first half always looked unrelated to the second half yet they are actually dependable to each other so that they make sense. I write as I think... it is unformulated and unedited.